Vivid

by Matthew Bertram

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02:10
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02:53
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03:41
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04:13
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04:55
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03:50
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03:23
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04:11
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04:14
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04:21
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03:06
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03:10
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03:19
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credits

released December 12, 2018

All music and lyrics by Matthew Bertram
Piano played by Matthew Bertram
All tracks mastered by @Djunwind
Album cover and track artwork by @nakedcarlyart

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all rights reserved

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about

Matthew Bertram Minneapolis, Minnesota

Classically trained pianist, has been composing music since an early age. Influences range from pop, rock, soul / R&B / hip- hop, to new age, to electronic / ambient, and to classical.
The music blends multiple genres into an eclectic fusion, but often lands in an 'easy listening' / pseudo-neo-jazz vibe.
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Track Name: Haven
I miss the spring time to see all the blooms
The flowers, the trees, and the grass
I miss the snow melting, it made such a mess
But worth it to see the contrast
I miss the spring rain, the smell of pure joy
I miss all the homemade decor
I miss Valentine's Day, the giving of love
I miss Easter Sunday, when the whole family was around
I really just miss home

I miss summer breeze, the warm muggy air
I miss frogs croaking at night
I miss the old tree-forts, the woods, and the trails
And the barn was such a sight
I miss the first garden, and the enormous cattails
I really just miss home
The smell of fresh cut grass, the longest dirt driveway
The pesky mosquitoes, and the view of the fields at dawn
I really just miss home

I miss the leaves falling, the orange landscape
I miss this season the most
When the colors changed, and we drove up the coast
I couldn't have asked for more
We drove for days and we saw so much beauty
I wish we had driven it more
My happy birthdays and the big county fair
School was restarting and each morning a chill in the air
I really just miss home

I miss winter time, the cold bitter air
I miss the big piles of snow
I miss the snowflakes, the smell of firewood
And a big mug of hot cocoa
I miss holidays, I miss having family
I really just miss home
The smell of fresh apple pie baking all day
The warmth of the fireplace filling the house always
I really just miss home
Track Name: Shell
Rip the flesh to feel alive, soak the tears you'll never cry
Feel the pain to feel okay, seer the flesh for sorrow to delay

Cut the shell, make a mark, forever tarnished, always damaged (x2)

Feeling empty, no control, eyes averted, voice is low
Facade is on - fake smiles all day, when finally home, the soul decays

Cut the shell, make a mark, forever tarnished, always damaged
Feel the blood, watch it pool, on the severed skin, how did this begin?

What are you doing? Permanent scars
It's not worth it - your flesh memoirs
It's not worth it, they'll be a chain
You'll look at them and just see pain

Please be good, please stay strong
You know that we love you no matter what you do
You'll be fine, just trust your mind
You know that you can, you know that you can
Track Name: Whole
I miss the days of summer, when we were so much younger
The night sky raged with thunder, and our minds filled with wonder
When the storm kept coming down, we kept on running all around
The night air filled with the sound, as the raindrops hit the ground
You'll always be my first

You were my first romance.... until you made my heart collapse
You were my everything... for you, I would have done anything
But you abandoned me... and left me with the debris
You shattered my soul... I'll never be whole

When we both reached out our hands, we really did not understand
We would make these future plans, and we would dream of Neverland
We could never go back there, when life was just so effortless
There's no scale to weigh the pain, the suffering is measureless
Neverland in flames without you

You were my first romance.... until you made my heart collapse
You were my everything... for you, I would have done anything
But you abandoned me... and left me with the debris
You shattered my soul... I'll never be whole (x2)

I always thought it would be strange, to see you now in a different place
So much time has come and gone, Those scars have healed and I've moved on
What's your life like, where have you been? Your hopes, your dreams, tell me about them?
I've always wondered why did you go? You gave reasons, but they were hollow
All I have is this tragic memory

You were my first romance.... until you made my heart collapse
You were my everything... for you, I would have done anything
But you abandoned me... and left me with the debris
You shattered my soul... I'll never be whole (x2)
Track Name: Never
Had it been me, the choice was clear
Had it been me, we would persevere

Had it been me, the one you’d choose
You said it’s not me, he I would lose

Granted, you never said you loved me
Granted, you never did say you cared
Granted, you never said you wanted this
Granted, no one said life was fair

Had it been me, my life diverged
Had it been me, would our life converge

You broke it off, in late July
Early August, you’re with a new guy

Granted, you never said you loved me
Granted, you never did say you cared
Granted, you never said you wanted this
Granted, no one said life was fair
Track Name: Agony
This is the place where I feel fine
Things are calm now, but I know it's time
To stress a little, walk around and listen to the sound
Of everybody telling me that I am not alone

But when no one is around me
And while the tears are falling down my face
And my eyes are red and they just won't dry
I'm feeling it all at once and I want to give up
I want to give up, I want to give up

Here they come now, am I okay?
No, yes, I'm fine and I'll be good
Just another day, so I lie a little and move on
Nobody really cares, I know, but in my heart of hearts...

I know they will be there for me
And while the tears are falling down my face
And my eyes are red and they just won't dry
I'm feeling it all at once and I want to give up
I want to give up, I want to give up

Here we go again...
Another year has gone by
Ready to feel the pain again
Ice my heart and fortify the agony, fortify the agony
I won't give up, I won't give up
This is the place where I feel fine
Things are calm now, until next time
Track Name: Basic
Riding in your black Volvo and we're going 65
Heading to the biggest mall - we sing 'till we arrive
Celebrities and homeless guys, we've seen it all before
Dealing with your hangry mood, but we still have 2 more floors!

Champagne bars and distilleries - they aren't my favorite place
Indeed, indeed, a mystery - hence the side eye on my face
Glamping, LA, Las Vegas - we've done it all before
Melrose Place is dumb AF, but that's what friends are for

Through it all, we are, we are, best friends - best friends forever

Nothing ever dampened things like Sunset Boulevard
Our game nights make up for that, with kittens on our cards
Roof top drama, whirlyball - when does it all end?
Happy hours and Anne Shirley, that's why you're my best friend

Bar bathroom for a quick selfie; your annual wine tastings
Limo rides and the sleep-overs - best of all: What's a composer?
Ok, ok, now let's get real, you are one of my best friends
Just kidding, you're number one, forever, ‘til the end

Through it all, we are, we are, best friends, best friends forever

You're not basic, lol, you're b-a-s-i-c
Haha, with your mom jeans on, back from 1993
What adventures awaits for us when we turn 65
We'll be singing the whole way there
‘cause we are BFFs... always on display

Through it all, we are, we are, best friends, best friends forever
Track Name: Ready
Here I am now, standing before you
Ready to take my vow, about to say I do

Babe, here we are - and you look so fine
Never been happier now that the day has arrived

Look in my eyes… say that you love me
And you'll always be mine, for now and eternity

Sealed with a kiss as breath escapes my lips
Track Name: Truth
How could you do this… love, so easy to dismiss
Why couldn't you resist? You told us we don't exist

How could you do this (resist)

Try to seek the truth… just try to think for you
You're a joke to us all. Play the victim, but it's your fault

How could you do this (resist)
Track Name: Weary
The road is long, the first-time pioneer
Gotta stay strong, there's no time for fear
Legs are tired, looking for some rest
Pathway is mired, need to pass this test

Cannot give up, though the thought is there
Can't interrupt, fighting back the despair

Just need to find, a glimmer of hope
Reaching the end, the end of the rope
Wiping the tears and sweat from the brow
The struggle is real, especially now
Thought this would be easier, but now here comes the truth
Looking back is easier, 'cause all there is is youth

As night collapses, and the sun reaches face
The soul is weary, and needs an embrace
Need a drop of strength to keep moving on
Nearing the finish line to end this marathon

Cannot give up, though, the thought is there
Can't cover up, fighting back this nightmare

Just need to find, a glimmer of hope
Reaching the end, the end of the rope
Wiping the tears and sweat from the brow
The struggle is real, especially now
Thought this would be easier, but now here comes the truth
Looking back is easier, 'cause all there is is youth

Just don't see how
Have to get through somehow
One step at a time
There's a mountain to climb, get a spine
Define landmines, deadlines, it's a sign
Streamline, outshine, up ahead the finish line, cloud nine
Track Name: Final
Wait for tomorrow, and a new day will start
The future is ready, as yesterday departs

Time keeps moving on. What kind of world will it be...
...a century after I began to breathe, in the year 2083?

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